My fellow introverts, we gotta face the cold hard truth. I hate that this needs to be said but based on the comments and messages I get, it does:
Being introverted/exhausted/anxious does not give us a pass to flake out on people.
No one likes a flake.
Seriously. It's only funny or acceptable in memes and even then I wonder if we're perpetuating the problem?
No-showing last minute is straight up hurtful. Why do we do this to the ones we care about?
Now I see you, so I know why. You peopled all day at work, or all week with family and the last thing you want to do is go to that thing you said you'd go to two weeks ago. Those were different times. You were young and hopeful then and now you're dead inside. But you said you'd go ughhh it sucks so bad, right?!
And what about your needs? What about your mental health and your capacity to be a good wife/mom/friend/human?!
But hear me when I say, if you committed to someone, it's better to go for an hour, thank the host, honestly explain you're exhausted, and leave early.
The best solution here is to
1) Quit saying yes to things you know you will dread. and
2) Build in more margin for yourself during the day or week so that you can go be there for whomever you said yes to! More margin may mean taking your lunch break alone in your car, or waking up early so you can sit alone for 10 minutes, taking a longer shower, etc.
Yes, take care of you, but be a kind human, lest you wake up one day and realize you're super duper lonely with no friends - shocker you pushed them all away! That's not taking care of you, now is it?!
Finding the right balance is tough but you can do it!
Kelsey
